Read My Mind


belonging-small-2What experiences make you feel optimistic, complete, and blessed? If you are like most people, it’s the feeling of being deeply connected, known, and valued. Feeling desired by those whom you desire. Belonging. This is probably the strongest of human drives. Read More

Bringing Up The Past

couple-fighting-smallI've kind of been stewing on this since I wrote it, and a couple things are bubbling up for me. First, how do you get over that "never forgetting" thing? I often find it hard to communicate with my wife, because I'm afraid of saying anything I'm not certain of, knowing that everything I say can and will be held against me.”

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What Does it Mean to Set the Tone and Take the Lead?

set-tone-blog-smallTypically, when I talk with men about setting the tone and taking the lead, they hear: “Be controlling.” The concept of “leading” is frightening, because most of the men with whom I work are Nice Guys who have spent their lives trying to be different from the controlling men they have heard women complain about. Initially, it is difficult to understand how setting the tone and taking the lead is not controlling or self-centered. Perhaps even more significantly, it’s difficult to understand why women like it.
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A True Life Adventure

people talking on sidewalkI’m a firm believer that miracles happen around people, so unless you’re around people, not much of interest will happen in your life. Every time I leave my house, I expect a miracle.
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How to Set Healthy Boundaries

boundaries stopIf we are conscious – in our higher, loving self – we can set boundaries with love and integrity. The more conscious we are, the more elegant and inviting our boundaries will be. The most loving boundaries are the ones that lead others into their own higher consciousness.
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Friends of a Certain Age

two friends jungleAs external conditions change, it becomes tougher to meet the three conditions that sociologists since the 1950s have considered crucial to making close friends: proximity; repeated, unplanned interactions, and a setting that encourages people to let their guard down and confide in each other. . .

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man taking off mask 1Nice Guys don’t believe it is okay to just be themselves. They believe they have to become what other people want them to be in order to liked, loved, and get laid. . . .
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Negativity Toward Women

gold digger licenseIt’s a pretty common dynamic among Nice Guys to have some negativity and resentment toward women. This is especially true for single guys who have either not had much success dating or guys who have a tendency to pick (and stay with) some pretty wounded women. . . .
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A Hungry Tiger in Every Mall

hungry tigerCan you imagine how exciting shopping would be if you actually had to be alert to the possibility of a hungry tiger lurking in the shoe department at Nordstrom? You would actually feel more alive and alert when you went to buy shoes. . . . Read More


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